“Be strong.”
As we plan my mother’s funeral, the word Strong comes up over and over. Be strong. Your mother was so strong.
What is strong?
Mom was a tall, physically strong woman, who grew up working on the farm. Her grip was strong. When she held your hand, you knew it. She could heave 25 pound bags of flour with one hand.
She was intelligent. Smart. Mathematically astute. She was mentally strong … until Alzheimer’s slowly destroyed her thinking skills.
Her body was strong. She bore eight daughters in 10 years.
She has a strong sense of justice and was determined to do the right thing. When she started selling real estate, she stood up for her clients. She built strong relationships.
She displayed endless resilience and stamina. She was strong-willed and determined; strong minded and stubborn. She fought off Alzheimer’s for 15 years before Covid caught her.
Helen passed on many qualities of her strength to her daughters and granddaughters – including some of that stubbornness and determination.
She’s been a trailblazer and role model for us, so if I am to honour my mother, I will stay strong.
That doesn’t mean I won’t fall apart. It means I will pursue my dreams, and do the things people tell me I can’t do.
I will cry. I will rant and rave from time to time. I will question life’s fairness.
Because being strong includes knowing that I cannot stand alone. Being strong acknowledges that I need support and love.
Being strong admits that at times I do not have the answer, and I don’t want to have the answer. That at times I want to make a decision and at other times I want someone else to make a decision for me.
Being strong is accepting.
Surrendering.
Knowing that ultimately, the greatest strength is being able to love.
To give love, receive love, share love … and leave a legacy of love.
Good bye Mom. Thank you for showering us with your strength.
I promise to be strong … in love.
